President Trump

Sitting in a café off Burke Street, reading in The Oz about Trump’s proposal to remove the refugee status from 90% of the five and a half million Palestinian so-called ‘refugees’, just part of his Middle East ‘Deal of the Century’. Pondering the implications of it all, lo and behold, who should sit down at the table beside me, but Aussie author Randa Abdel-Fattah.

Abdel-Fattah is of course famous for such amusing books as ‘Does my Backside look Big In This Burqa?’, ‘No Sex In The City – At Least, Not For Us Muzzies!’ and ‘Ten Things Everyone Should Hate About Me’, has a First-Class Honours in Onanism* and holds fifty-seven PHDs in Islamophobia from the University of Melbourne.

Highly intelligent and allegedly well-educated, Abdel-Fattah is also of Egyptian-Palestinian extraction – perfect for a friendly, civilised discussion about Trump’s proposed move and its ramifications.

So I lean across, politely introduce myself with a smile, and affably ask her how Trump’s plan would affect ordinary people like me? For example, does she think that it would be reasonable for me, in my blog, to continue to denounce all Palestinians as nothing but a bunch of f**kin’ terrorists who the Israelis should bomb the f**k out of at regular intervals, and her answer, “You f***n’ #@!%^racist$@!*&%… etc.” (accompanied to the sound of smashing plates), prompts me instead to call up Fraser Anning – noted for his moderation in these matters – who says, yes, of course, it’s fine, perfectly reasonable to me. So there you have it.

Turning to the cryptic-crossword in the Oz back pages, and to the Nakba* clue. “Palestinian fairy-tale” doesn’t quite fit (though it should), but both “serves’emright” and “self-inflicted” do. Strange.

Then the latter (“self-inflicted”) tees up with the 8-down Master of the Universe clue (ans:“DonaldJTrump”), and all is good.

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*Onanism – (Google) Prerequisite qual. for Islamophobia PHD at Melbourne Uni.
**Nakba – (Google) 1948 Muslim holocaust hoax